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'Whistle!'
     A quarter of an hour later, to  the astonishment  of  the people in the
restaurant, on the  boulevard and at the  windows of the surrounding houses,
the  barman, the  porter, a policeman, a waiter and the poet Ryukhin were to
be seen emerging from  the gates  of Griboyedov dragging a young man trussed
up like a  mummy, who was weeping, spitting,  lashing  out  at  Ryukhin  and
shouting for the whole street to hear :
     'You swine! . . . You swine! . . . '
     A buzzing  crowd collected, discussing  the incredible scene. It was of
course an  abominable,  disgusting, thrilling,  revolting scandal which only
ended when  a  lorry drove  away from the gates  of Griboyedov carrying  the
unfortunate Ivan Nikolayich, the policeman, the barman and Ryukhin.



6. Schizophrenia



     At half past one in the morning  a man with a pointed beard and wearing
a  white overall  entered the reception hall of a  famous psychiatric clinic
recently completed in  the  suburbs of Moscow. Three orderlies  and the poet
Ryukhin  stood nervously watching Ivan Nikolayich as he sat on  a divan. The
dish-cloths that had been used to  pinion  Ivan Nikolayich now lay in a heap
on the same divan, leaving his arms and legs free.
     As the man came in Ryukhin turned pale, coughed and said timidly:
     'Good morning, doctor.'
     The  doctor  bowed  to Ryukhin but looked  at Ivan Nikolayich,  who was
sitting completely immobile and  scowling furiously. He  did not  even  move
when the doctor appeared.
     'This,  doctor,' began  Ryukhin  in  a  mysterious  whisper, glancing
anxiously at Ivan Nikolayich,  ' is the  famous  poet  Ivan  Bezdomny. We're
afraid he may have D.Ts.'
     'Has he been drinking heavily? ' enquired the doctor through  clenched
teeth.
     'No, he's had a few drinks, but not enough . . .'
     'Has he been trying to catch spiders, rats, little devils or dogs? '

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